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People watching at corn stall in front of Pazhamudhir Cholai:

Mr.Stoned – Rendu corn.(Starts walking away looking like he just landed on Earth from an alien spaceship and for the love of his life, doesn’t understand where he is or what he is doing.)

Corn Guy – Saar, saar… Cup aa stick aa??

Mr.Stoned – uh?? haaa…. Apdi na?

Corn Guy – (picks up a cup in one hand and a whole corn kernel in other hand and posing exactly like these telemarketers selling dandruff creams on tv) Cup aaaaa, stick aaaaa??

Mr.Stoned – Uh… cup (and starts walking away again)

Corn Guy – Saar, yenna flavour?

Mr.Stoned – huh??

Corn Guy – Pepper and saltu, butter and saltu, masala.

Mr.Stoned – (mumbles like his voice is too precious for the world to hear it)Yennavo podunga.

Corn Guy – (slowly starting to sound like my mother when she’s about to yell at me for something) Eating aa packing aa?

Mr.Stoned – Eh?? haaa…. ummm… (looks towards the Fruit stall and starts walking as if he’s attracted towards it by the undiscovered magnetic field of oranges and apples) Yedho pannunga pannunga…

Now Corn Guy starts muttering under his breath and making the corn. Well, i did strain my ears to catch the pleasant things he was saying but unfortunately he wasn’t loud enough. He goes on to pack two cups of plain corn and then got back to his other customers. After a solid 10 mins, our guy comes out of the fruit stall empty handed, walks right next to the corn stall without as much as glancing at it, and continues walking out of the gate.

Corn Guy – Saaarrrr, saaaaaaaarrr……. Yoooooovvvvvvvv!!

Mr. Stoned has safely crossed the road.

Corn Guy – Saavu kraaki, vandhu serraanunga paaru, $#@$#, $$#!# <insert (in)appropriate family/mother/sister scolding here>

My genuine kostin : Ganja vaa illa patta saaraayama??

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Ms.Salwar kameez with gym shoes (hereafter referred to as Ms.SKWGS) – Annaaaa…annaaaa

Corn Guy doesn’t seem too pleased with this newly forming paasamalar relationship.

“One cup corn. Half steamed. No pepper. No salt. No butter. No chat masala. ”

Corn guy mutters under his breath ‘Corn aavadhu podalaama illa adhuvum venaama’ which Ms. SKWGS conveniently ignores. He hands her the cup starts to make the next one.

“Annaaa, this corn is too steamed. I want half steamed only.”

Corn guy gives her a blank look and bends down again.

“Can you just take some corn seperately and heat it just for 3 and a half minutes with0ut adding water and give me. Annaaaa?? This is just killing all the nutrients in the corn. It is not at all healthy…”

“Dha paaru maa..Venaaam na vechittu poikittee iru.”

Ms.SKWGS mutters “Kaasu kuduthiten la.. Yaen solla maata” and walks away.

My genuine kostin: Ivlo healthy ya saaptu yenna dhaan saadhikka poreenga??

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Very rotund aunty balancing two bags filled with grocery, one more with fruits and yelling into phone while giving instructions to the Corn Guy.

“Oru corn. Cup.” Goes back to yelling into the phone to Chinnu who apparently has chosen not to do the day’s homework.

“Yenna flavor madam? Pepper and saltu, butter and saltu…”

“Butter. Chinnuuuuu, Amma solradhu kekala night pizza vaangi thara maaten. ”

“Madam masala podalaama?”

“B-U-T-T-E-R. CHINUUUU… Kadhula vizhudha illaya daaaaa???”

“Ummmm madam, pepper….”

“BUTTER PODUNGA. YETHANA THADAVA SOLRADHU?? NERAYA PODUNGA. CHINNUU… PIZZA VA UPMA VA? OZHUNGA HOMEWORK PANNU!!”

Now corn guy seems really scared and puts three spoonfuls of butter into the small cup of corn and thrusts it humbly into the aunty’s hands.

She got into a waiting car and screamed at the driver to go to….. well,no points for guessing this one. Pizza Hut.

Ok, We get it. Butter. Cheese. Pizza. Anything fattening.

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P.S. No, you are not allowed to ask whether I was so vetti and jobless to eavesdrop on a sweet corn seller’s conversation for so long. It is known. It is understood. Move on.

Moral of the story – Selling corn is a tough job.

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Honesty ‘tags’ along

*Starts typing rubbing hands with glee and with a stupid grin plastered across the face*


Tagged! Veti has presented me an award (ahem, ahem) which I have displayed proudly below:

honestscrapaward

As a bonus I have a tag to do as well. Thanks Veti, more for the tag than the award. The rules of this tag are:

“When accepting this auspicious award, you must write a post bragging about it, including the name of the misguided soul who thinks you deserve such acclaim, and link back to the said person so everyone knows she/he is real. Choose a minimum of seven (7) blogs that you find brilliant in content or design. Or improvise by including bloggers who have no idea who you are because you don’t have seven friends. Show the seven random victims’ names and links and leave a harassing comment informing them that they were prized with Honest Weblog. Well, there’s no prize, but they can keep the nifty icon. List at least ten (10) honest things about yourself. Then pass it on!”

I love tags. Primarily because it’s easier to answer questions in a readymade format than rack your brains to come up with something readable every other time. But this tag seems like the kind which might end up making me think since it asks me 10 honest things about myself. Which means I have to do quite a bit of introspection at the end of which I’m sure I’ll be just where I started. Clueless. Ok, let’s not get disheartened now. After all we love tags don’t we?? 🙂 So here we go!



1. I am a classic example of an ambivert. I can be gregarious, playful, funny and sarcastic with a certain set of people as much as I can be disinterested, bored, excruciatingly polite with others. I cannot feign false interest in matters in which I have absolutely no interest in, and that includes mega serials, gold jewellery, long and tiresome shopping, etc. I can be as tongue tied as much I can’t stop talking sometimes. Simply put, I cannot socialise for the sake of socialising. And it’s more of a bane than a boon.


2. I am paralysed each morning until I get my hot piping dosage of theobromine and feel incomplete until I’ve read the newspaper from cover to cover. And talking of tea, I go into a trance every time a steaming cup of tea/coffee is thrust into my hands. That’s the time I think out solutions to work, decide what book
to read next, make up elaborate weekend plans and work out experimental recipes. In short, that’s probably the only time of the day I THINK.


3. I am a hard core, true blue Foodie. I love food. Love experimenting with various cuisines and flavours. When making plans for a weekend, the first thing that I plan is where to eat and work out everything else around that. Yeah, I’m that bad! When I’m travelling, all it takes is the sight of a favourite restaurant for me to launch into long monologues about the restaurant’s history, their speciality dishes, and anecdotes about what happened when I was there last, etc unless someone reminds me to stop. Every time I binge out I take this irresolute resolution to cut down but I know it’s only a passing phase. After all, resolutions are never meant to be kept.


4. I love being alone. It does feel a bit weird to say it, but yeah I love the time I get to spend all by myself. I love the days when I used to impulsively call in sick at work in the mornings, pack off mom and dad to work and spend the entire day all by myself. Simply lazing around the house, making scrambled eggs and drinking cold coffee, reading passages from favourite books, sleeping like it’s nobody’s business… I love the silence and solace of it. I’ve been bored with dozens of people around but I’ve never been bored alone. I love the company of my loved ones but I love my own company as well 😛 Like they say, if you can’t stand your own company, who can??


5. I’m scared of technology. Actually I’m diffident of it. I have always had the thought that I’m technologically challenged and its so deeply ingrained into my system that even if it’s something that I know like the back of my hand my initial reaction is to panic when someone asks me anything slightly technical. I may know my laptop inside out but when anybody starts a question like ‘Does your CPU utilisation match…’, next second I’m ready to flee the room. But there is even a positive twist to my technology-phobia. It has made me realise that it’s not always about knowing things but its more about believing that you know them.


6. I’m communication challenged. I don’t call people for fear of disturbing them. I don’t attend calls since my phone is on silent mode most of the time. I see text messages hours after they had been sent and don’t reply because it would be very rude to reply late. Yeah it’s ruder not to reply at all but well, that’s me. Thankfully these days social networking is big. Orkut, Facebook and now the latest in-thing Twitter are god sent for me. Without these I’d be
marooned and constantly missing people I love but never really in touch with them.


7. Confession time! I don’t know why but I really enjoy reading tabloids and all these film magazines with glossy covers and beautiful people on them. Half the time I’m only flipping through the pages and looking at the pictures but every time I see these overpriced glossies on the stands, my hands itch to buy one.


8. I hate my writing (I pretended not to hear that collective SO Do We). Sad, but true. When I hear all these writers and artists talk fondly about their work like they were their babies, I sigh like the Whistling Woods. I am hyper critical of each and every word I write and each time I write a new post, I think it’s so bad that it doesn’t deserve to be put up on the blog. Then I console myself that it’s all that I can do, that I can’t possibly get any better and end up putting it up on the blog, not wanting to read it again ever, pitying all the poor folks who might be unfortunate enough to read it. Pathetic?? I second it. 😐


9. I’m a living example of Murphy’s Law. If I’m happy that something is going fine, it goes horribly the very next day. If I’m glad that my laptop isn’t giving me any problems, tomorrow it’ll crash without notice. I touchwood thinking I haven’t fought with anybody recently and there is a major world war in the cards the next day. If I happen to even think I haven’t fallen sick for long, I fall sick at once. So then, brilliant that I am, I tried to work it the other way round – having all horrible negative thoughts so that they end up happening positive. And then I found out that it doesn’t work the other way round. Murphy never had it easy, did he?


10. I’ve been thinking of some thing nice, but honest, to say about myself all along and I could come up only with this. I value love and respect above everything else. I believe that they are the foundation upon which any relationship can be built. And I don’t think they can be mutually exclusive. Where there is love, there should be respect above everything else. If not, then it is not love. As simple as that. I’m anti male chauvinism. And Anti feminism. I only stand for humanism and mutual respect of human beings.


Sabba!! Done. Not an easy tag at all. Next time I’d prefer easier tags like ’10 favourite restaurants’ or ‘last ten books you read’ or ’10 ideas of how to do nothing’ I really can’t afford to tag unwilling people and endure curses forever after. Been there, done that. So I’ll just let anyone who wants to, take this tag up and bare their souls out. Tchau!

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